You should be able to do that...

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Everyone in life has different *things* which cause frustration.  For me often the primary source of frustration is around language and communication.

A recent lifehacker podcast "How to get Your Point Across Online" reminded me of how easy it is to fall into the trap of 'You should be able to do that...'

There are many things I am not very good at, at least not in the not so humble opinion of others.

I am not a multitasker, I cannot listen to/respond to more than one conversation at  time. I cannot remember things well (or where I put them) without prompts or reminders, and I quickly become anxious when confronted with a new situation that scares me, and it takes time for me to process my emotions.

It is so easy for others to dismiss my 'quirkiness' as a flaw either in my ability as a person or in my personality.

I suppose in people's mind we setup a "personna" of what every person should be able to do, and if they cannot just 'do it', the attitude is well they better learn how.

The problem is..it doesn't really work that way, people fundamentally are unique.  Some people have natural talents for swimming, others for multitasking, others for solving complex algebraic equations without a calculator.

Just because you can do  it, does not mean it comes so easily to someone else.

Perhaps even their are tasks out there that 90% of the population can do (like unclogging a toilet) but if you are one of the 10% who cannot, that doesn't mean you are flawed, there are probably things you can do that 90% of the rest of the population cannot.

There is no harm in trying, and failing, there is no harm in asking for help, and do not let that voice (either external or internal) tell you 'you should be able to do that'.  Rephrase it with something meaningful.

"Multitasking" is not something I am good at yet...

or

"Multitasking" works differently for me

or

"I would rather hire a professional to fix my toilet and make sure it remains problem free,then mess with it myself as it is not my area of expertise"



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